having a hard time to fit in...

Funny that what I am feeling now at work is like one of those movies where there’s the “it” group and the “geeks/freaks” group. It’s been over a month now since I’ve started at HPS… but trying to get into the group is really giving me a headache… as of now I really wanna quit… but that’s not alboi… alboi never quits… he just go on vacation! Hahhaha!

I don’t know what’s wrong with me… am I not the same alboi before who never had a hard time fitting in to a group. I used to belong to the “it” group but now it seems like we are being bullied… but not really… Weird! He he he…

Yes we do had a teambuilding last weekend… everything has gone okay… aside from some instances… of course from that guy! I was having high hopes that starting Monday everything will change… but then again I was wrong… or am I? Is this paranoia? Darn! I really miss everyone from accenture… the warmth from everyone… and trying to fit in isn’t that hard there.

At the end of the day I’m still thankful that I have good friends amongst them.

closing cycles

an officemate forwarded this email to me the other day... it might be of help to someone....

Closing Cycles -- By Paolo Coelho

One always has to know when a stage comes to an end.

If we insist on staying longer than the necessarytime,

we lose the happiness and the meaning of theother stages we have to go through.

Closing cycles, shutting doors, ending chapters whatever name we giveit,

what matters is to leave in the past the moments

of life that have finished.

Did you lose your job?

Has a loving relationship cometo an end?

Did you leave your parents' house?

Gone to live abroad?

Has a long-lasting friendship ended allof a sudden?

You can spend a long time wondering why this hashappened.

You can tell yourself you won't take another

step until you find out why certain things that were

so important and so solid in your life have turned

into dust, just like that.

But such an attitude will be awfully stressing foreveryone involved:

your parents, your husband or wife,

your friends, your children, your sister, everyone

will be finishing chapters, turning over new leaves,

getting on with life, and they will all feel bad

seeing you at a standstill.

None of us can be in the present and the past at the

same time, not even when we try to understand the

things that happen to us.

What has passed will notreturn: we cannot for ever be children, late

adolescents, sons that feel guilt or rancor towards

our parents, lovers who day and night relive an affair

with someone who has gone away and has not the least

intention of coming back.

Things pass, and the best we can do is to let them

really go away.

That is why it is so important (however painful it maybe!)

to destroy souvenirs, move, give lots of things

away to orphanages, sell or donate the books you haveat home.

Everything in this visible world is a

manifestation of the invisible world, of what is going

on in our hearts and getting rid of certain memories

also means making some room for other memories to take

their place. Let things go. Release them. Detach yourself from them.

Nobody plays this life with marked cards,

so sometimes we win and sometimes we lose.

Do not expect anything in return, do not expect your efforts to be appreciated,

your genius to be discovered, your love to be understood.

Stop turning on your emotional television to watch the same program over and over again,

the one that shows how much you suffered from acertain loss:

that is only poisoning you, nothingelse.

Nothing is more dangerous than not accepting love relationships that are broken off,

work that is promised but there is no starting date,

decisions that are always put off waiting for the ideal moment.

Before a new chapter is begun, the old one has to befinished:

tell yourself that what has passed willnever come back.

Remember that there was a time when

you could live without that thing or that person

nothing is irreplaceable, a habit is not a need.

This may sound so obvious, it may even be difficult,

but itis very important.

Closing cycles. Not because of pride, incapacity or arrogance,

but simply because that no longer fits your life.

Shut the door, change the record, clean thehouse, shake off the dust.

Stop being who you were, and change into who you are.

nice try

...the moment of truth... after months of hard work... the test of how well i did durin training has come. i was at last included at the line-up for the race... it the 1st manila dragon cup (2.5k regatta)... i dunno what the hell happened to me that during the first hit my left arm just hardened... or whatever you may call it... i find it hard to paddle the right way... this maybe caused by the adrenaline rush, as they say, i felt that time... plus the fact that the boat that time was suprisingly heavy... i was sitting before the last man and i really felt something was really wrong... we were much better...well, way much better than this on trainings... and so i realized the people in the line up was those who doesn't attend the trainings.... and there's really nothing to expect that time... serves as a lesson for the team... and as ive said to pat, "i just hope they did learn something from the event"... I am not justifying anything but we could have done better if everyone was coming on training days. It was a big suprise that La Salle, our former adopted team won first place on that hit... how i wish RCP have that same discipline... The women's crew deserves honor as well for they too won first place on their hit... or was it 2nd... or whatever... the thing is they've qualified for the final round.

-----> my next sport on the list to try would be: WATER POLO and SCUBBA DIVING

sumthing sumthin'

"Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it."

--Buddha

just when i almost lost hope

"...when darkness seems draining all your hopes... just think of the stars at night and see how the darkness made it more visible..."

After five months of waiting finally my prayer's were answered.... Unfortunately not the one I really wished for... but it's a good alternative though, since my freaking middle name problem would really take a while before i could have it fixed... I might as well get my ass to work and earn again... and so I did... last Monday I went here at IHG and give the reservation agent a try... and to my luck there's a vacant position that somehow what ive been asking for when deejay from the HR called me last month ago...

First two days was just merely 8hours of lectures and I am so anxious to get some hands-on for me to understand better. Everyone's seems nice, but still the warmth at my previous colleagues were the thing I do missed. As of now I am trying to fit in, so as Elaine (another trainee).

The work actually is very simple, the extraction is somehow the bottleneck of it all, it takes some of them half day to complete the generation of the reports. But to what I've heard I could finish my weekly workload in 4 days, that means I have my Friday as my paid rest day... he he he... it's a good thing there's a resource area here so I could check some mails... the break/activity rooms here are very comfy! Plus I could get to sleep if im bored... but i prefer reading so friends gotta lend me more of your books!

Anyways I think I might be staying here for a while though... and im happy im back here at makati.